Quake aftermath

This is what I . wrote last time, a week after the quake.
It is not like that this time. We are sleeping better because the aftershocks are not as frequent or as large but everything is different. Last time I said the aftershocks "are now just part of life". It is not the same now. We had an aftershock last night and my body reacted so badly - my heart was racing and the adrenaline started pumping and although I don't want to admit it I was terrified. I think it is because last Tuesday, I thought it was just another aftershock and I didn't initially react and as the shaking got worse and we huddled under that counter listening to crashing glass, I still didn't really believe what was happening. Now my body thinks any of these aftershocks could develop like that. My head can tell you all the scientific data and the logical sequence of aftershocks but my body no longer trusts the brain and reacts all on its own before any signal from my thoughts.
We still do not have any water. We thankfully have power. Last time I was already talking of moving on and getting on with life. I was preparing to go back to the central city for Lucy's school the following week. There is none of that this time. Instead I get messages from people no longer coming back to Christchurch. They have lost their businesses or their jobs. Many people have left town temporarily. Our future is completely different too, with the shop shutting and working out how we can do markets and keep the webshop going.
Today I was looking in the boxes of sticky products, I was straight back there with the smell of sauces combining and the crashing and shattering of glass.
This is going to be a long process - for our city and for our hearts.